glass half full / half empty / so full you need three glasses x
had the most thought-provoking, perception shifting, mind opening evening getting to witness my darling @sjolund_sara in conversation with the incredible @merlin.sheldrake 🍄 i have a feeling I will be revisiting this talk in my mind quite a bit in the future. thank you @geist_talks for hosting. can’t wait for more (and thank you @madeleinethompsoncashmere for this heavenly cuddle of a dress on this cold cold night)
@angelakohler remember this?
in another life, before I met this wonderful man, before our two incredible children shook my heart until the walls fell down, I used to go to beautiful places, sure. I had so much time – time to do whatever I wanted whenever I felt like it, and my stretched out belly didn’t hang over my swimsuit like a baggy old jumper (though I thought it did – ha, i say. ha) and I wasted so much not being able to be present or grateful. I spent so much time locked in my head, criticizing my body, my choices, so often feeling lonely and lost and outside of my body. Now, I am rarely alone, a soft, warm, ravenous baby usually on my boob (making picture-taking or doing anything at all very challenging), or a squirming toddler on my hip screaming tidy tidy tidy awaaaay to the Frère Jacques melody (an unbelievably sticky earworm despite only having two words- sorry everyone at our hotel and in the surrounding area), and I often have to make choices like … do I shave my legs or brush my teeth (or oops neither) – this all plus the baby was sick and we had to try and navigate the emergency room in a hospital an hour away where we don’t speak the language and oh the toddler melted down for the four hundredth time because she wanted to wear pink leather trainers on the beach which would most definitely not be a good idea (try explaining this to a yowling two year old)… but I have never, ever had a better holiday, or felt more in my sweet, battered body or my life. the gifts that a family has given me are continually surprising, often unbelievably funny, and more beautiful than I could have ever hoped it would be. ** Tom has just pointed out that calling my belly a baggy old jumper is being incredibly mean to my body! Oh yes. It is. Self- talk still a work in progress!
I’ll be doing an instagram live tonight (March 28) with writer/ director of the Come on Baby video @tom_cullen UK 8:30 pm / 3:30 EST / 12:30 PST to discuss the making of story behind the video… Please DM us any questions/ thoughts you might have and we will do our best to include them. Link to watch the video is in my bio stories. Looking forward to sharing this with you. Lots of love, Alison Tom 📷 by @llion_gethin
this kid, man. this magic kid.
on Tuesday the 21st, 11am UK time, we finally get to share the video of “come on baby with you”. directed by the incredibly brave @tom_cullen made with everything we had in us- love, tears, pain, purpose- this is the molten center of the album. the night of. the dance of heartbreak. laid bare, cracked open, there is a freedom in facing pain head on, even when it’s terrifying. I couldn’t be more proud of Tom, our wonderful crew and this that we made, and cannot wait to share it with you. Soon soon. love you have a beautiful weekend X
I’d like to thank @tom_cullen for this beautiful video. It was his vision, his persistence, his enormous heart, his courage and immense talent that called in our incredible team and brought this piece of art into being. This album isn’t just my story, it’s ours, and the fact that we were able to collaborate on this is incredibly special. But f*** it was hard. I had to push through a lot of internal resistance to face the emotions this video brought up. On set, there were times where I was prickly, fiery, stubborn, confrontational- I was terrified to let myself be cracked open yet again even though I knew that was what it deserved. I fought like a wounded animal, defending my injury against the one who was trying to mend it. Tom was kind, steady and compassionate, like he always is. He understood, like he always does, what was writhing under the surface, and he provided the firm, unwavering support I needed to let it move through my body. So much loosened in me afterwards, and there was a sense of internal space and quiet that has remained since. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to dance this grief out of me with you, Tom. And the two of us thank you for taking the time to witness what we made. link to watch the full video is in my bio. With love, a x
April 4th we will be playing Omeara london w/ @albertacross @martinlukebrown – can’t wait to see you x x x
it’s out tomorrow. we love you. #comeonbaby #musicvideo #alisonsudol #stillcomethenight #grief
“people say that time will sort me out / drowning in tomorrows” ~ the clearing. one of the trippiest things about writing songs is that they become little time capsules for your life. if you’re lucky, you catch a very specific moment with a net of words, snuggle it into a nest of instruments woven by melody, and pin it down into lasting form as truthfully as you can with microphones cables, machines, praying that you haven’t f***ed it in the process. I am so grateful to have caught this moment in time this way. I remember writing the words, walking along tiny country lanes in Wales with Gertie near the studio, praying a car wouldn’t come so I wouldn’t have to climb into a hedge with a dog on my back, puffy-eyed but calm. I was grieving, yes, but because I had a space to pour that sadness into, an excuse, a purpose for peeling the layers apart, the grief felt strangely alive. life-giving, even. writing recording this music with @chrishyson @alexhainesmusic @lloydhaines with @superstaralex90 capturing it was full of joy – even though I cried so much I also laughed till I nearly peed myself…
Often. Grief earlier in my life had always left me disembodied, disassociated, numb, lost, looking for a way out-
that was all there, looming, but by exploring the loss through music, I could suddenly see it, and feel it in all its fullness… which hurt less, strangely, after the initial sting, than years of frozen avoidance. i listen to this song and I remember the crossroads, the thick darkness pierced by the sheer willingness to look into it. @federiconessi took these photos, and again, he managed to catch the ephemeral- how tempting it is to leave your body when the pain is too much to bear. To revisit these now, with my ripe, heavy belly making it almost impossible to find a comfortable seated position, fills me with deep gratitude for the journey that has led me here, for the people that have walked along it with me and the tomorrows that didn’t drown anything except a part of me that needed go anyways- the part that would leave when things got too much. making space for new life to enter. the clearing.
we’re playing @omearalondon tonight with @martinlukebrown @albertacross see u laters alligators
coming soon x #comeonbaby #musicvideo #alisonsudol
thank you so much for joining us on this epic journey through grief and dance. so much love from both @tom_cullen and I x
my dear brilliant friend @laurifaggioni went into a dark cave of solitude and emerged months later with an animated film for “bone tired” – I can hardly believe something so beautiful could have fallen in my lap like this. full video premiering tomorrow – see it first in @the_gentlewoman newsletter and everywhere soon to follow. sending love x
once again, floored by the complete and utter beauty that @bora_aksu conjures. another exquisite collaboration with @leithclark 🖤 thank you for feeding our eyes and soul with art and meticulous craftsmanship. loved every moment. in honor of Bora’s home country, Turkey, please consider donating anything you can spare to @chooselove – their partners are on the ground working on continued rescue missions, emergency medical care, shelter and food for those affected by this devastating event. anything helps. much love x
we’re all very excited that @alexhainesmusic chose to spend his birthday with us (especially @chrishyson ) – happy birthday you brilliant human being, Al xx
we’re all very excited that @alexhainesmusic chose to spend his birthday with us (especially @chrishyson ) – happy birthday you brilliant human being, Al xx
we’re all very excited that @alexhainesmusic chose to spend his birthday with us (especially @chrishyson ) – happy birthday you brilliant human being, Al xx
keeping the wild against the domestication of the earth / tom butler
in the pursuit of something greater than ourselves, there is a place which exists beyond exhaustion, beyond joy, beyond grief, beyond expectations. with nothing left to give, in that limitless empty space, unexpectedly a clarity can come. an answer, an opening, an offering, if only you can remain awake enough to receive it. this bone tired animation by my brilliant friend @laurifaggioni – 117 feet of unbroken, painstakingly loving creation / aired first by our dear friends at @thegentlewoman. Link in bio for the full video.
Credits:
Film made by @laurifaggioni
Colour by Javier Velázquez at @lasala.post
ONE BREATH
ONE MINUTE
ONE HOUR
ONE DAY
@alisonsudol 🤍
@federiconessi 📷
ONE BREATH
ONE MINUTE
ONE HOUR
ONE DAY
@alisonsudol 🤍
@federiconessi 📷