Laverne Cox Instagram – This one is huge. I go into more detail in the full episode of @callherdaddy available on Spotify. But getting used to being treated well, getting comfortable with the sometimes very uncomfortable moments of real intimacy is something we can practice with friends, a good therapist, in group therapy, a good recovery program. So when the real love, that real deal love finally shows up and we have to be vulnerable (because part of finding love requires both parties to be vulnerable) our nervous systems are familiar what this feels like and we can respond by not freaking out. If we have trauma and abuse in our backgrounds, often trauma and abuse feels like love. Our nervous systems have turned an alarm bell into a dinner bell. We have to practice overtime with people who are safe, (ideally a good therapist being one of them,) so our nervous systems eventually know the difference between an alarm bell and a dinner bell. I also talk in even more depth about this on my own podcast #TheLaverneCoxShow in the episodes on trauma resilience and attachment theory. Just look them up when you search my podcast. … Good luck to you all. Stay in the love.