Anel Alexander Instagram – “In Loving Memory of ’The Prince of Gingers’, James Alexander, 8 Jan 1978 – 28 Apr 2023. By His Grace. For James, who loved this view, from Anel, who always sat beside him.”
On Sunday 28 April 2024 a bunch of family and friends went to the Drakensberg to scatter James’ ashes and put up a memorial bench for him. It felt surreal. One regularly sees those benches in parks and overlooking beautiful vistas. But it always belongs to somebody else. Some other ‘Beloved Grandpa’ or ‘Mother, daughter and friend, RIP’. But this time it was my bench…
My family has a home in the Central Drakensberg and James and I’ve been going there for the 22 years we were together. From our honeymoon in April 2003 to our very last ‘holiday’ 2 weeks before his terminal diagnosis end of January 2023.
We put up a bench for him in our favourite spot and planted a tree with his ashes. We had a really special memorial weekend with the friends and family. We laughed and cried, shared memories and photos and thanked God for his life. We decided to put a few different plaques on his bench as it was impossible to just sum him up in a few words. James would have liked it.
It was a beautiful, heartbreaking weekend and I was just reminded again about how we cannot do this alone. We need our family and friends. And also, we need to realize, that someday, it’s gonna be your bench. That’s just part of life. Try to live a life that will elicit people to write the kind of messages that James, despite all his tortured flaws, deserved on his bench. Our bench… | Posted on 06/Jun/2024 22:51:23
