I don’t usually comment on news stories; trying to keep this a safe and positive space, but tonight I feel compelled to urge all News Outlets to remember the children involved in the Huw Edwards story. Childhood sexual abuse is horrific. When an adult violates a child it instils terror, confusion, grave shock, pain and often creates a devastating legacy. For images to be taken and then shared, the shame, and horror, may last a lifetime. I hope the children in the reported footage / images, may be identified, and receive the appropriate support, even though, as I type, I realise the many challenges there may be, in so many respects. For anyone who is affected by this story please do reach out to someone you feel you can trust, or to an experienced professional – or the many charities that support children – and adults – who have experienced childhood sexual abuse. @nspcc_official @napac.uk @the.greenhousebristol @oneinfourirish @thesurvivorstrustuk @thesun @dailymail @bbcnews @guardian @telegraph @itvnews @channel4news @channel5_tv #sexualabuse #trauma #traumarecovery
@tinybuddhaofficial “So often, children are punished for being human. Children are not allowed to have grumpy moods, bad days, disrespectful tones, or bad attitudes, yet we adults have them all the time… None of us are perfect, and we must stop holding our children to a higher standard of perfection than we can attain ourselves. All of the punishments you could throw at them will not stamp out their humanity, for to err is human, and we all do it sometimes.” ~Rebecca Eanes @rebeccaeanes I totally agree Rebecca, when we understand neurobiology and apply the science of child development we realise with profound clarity that our children are navigating life with a brain much less developed than our own … so how CAN we judge them by our own adult standards ?! #tinybuddha #quotes #dailyquotes #quotesdaily #quoteoftheday #wisdom #wordsofwisdom #wisdomquotes #dailywisdom #parenting #parentingquotes #positiveparenting #gentleparentingtips
I am hugely grateful to Kate for her courage and generosity in this episode of the podcast ✨💕 We had both a tender and painful conversation. Although you may not have experienced the trauma of sexual abuse as a child (or you may have) you will recognise how our early strategies to manage pain are often maladaptive and they live on in us until we face the pain. As you can intimate from this reel, Kate explains how parts of ourselves become exiled in order to cut off from devastating abuse. The work is to find a way to integrate that fragile part “back into the fold..” To learn how Kate did this work find the link to the full episode in my stories or head to your favourite podcast platform. This episode is also available to watch on my YouTube Channel 🎧🎙️
For all those of you who have reached out to share, many of you for the first time, your experience of childhood sexual abuse, thank you for your courage and your trust. It takes enormous bravery to reach out for help and to share our story. Because so often, as children ( and now as adults) we have carried such a terrible sense of shame for what was done to us. The shame is not ours. Many of you have asked where best to seek support and I have listed some of the charities that work with adults and children who have experienced sexual abuse. Please do reach out because there is help to be found. I respond to as many messages as I am able to in this forum, but in the interests of trying to reach and support as many people as I can, may I refer you to my recent interview with @juliasamuelmbe for her Therapy Works podcast as i hope it might also prove helpful. In it I share my own experience of intra-familial childhood sexual abuse. The interview is very contained and my sharing is not specific, so I hope it is not a difficult listen, but rather one of hope. In the interview I explain how this pernicious and very complex trauma has impacted me throughout my life but, importantly, how I have learned to heal. It’s so important that we focus on the impact of sexual abuse on children. It leaves a devastating legacy and until, and unless, we are able to bring this evil into the light, it can keep us in the dark for most of our lives, influencing our decisions & behaviour, in ways we may find hard to understand. Today I am thinking of the children behind the current headlines and shame on any media outlet that does not do the same. When a child is violated sexually it robs them of their innocence, their sense of self. It fractures their soul. We must acknowledge this heinous crime for what it is: not ‘child porn’, but child rape. For all you still suffering, I stand with you and alongside. I hope in sharing some of my own story it may offer some small comfort, that, with support, we can come through. And remember, the shame is, and never was, ours. @nspcc_official @one_in_four_uk @the.greenhousebristol @beaconhouseteam #trauma #traumarecovery
Had a brilliant time taking your questions @thismorning … #backtoschool SWIPE ➡️ to hear some of the tips I shared – AND to see which Hollywood star has gone home with a copy of ‘there’s still no such thing as naughty’ !! 🎊🎊💪🏼 #thismorning #theresnosuchthingasnaughty #parenting
Had a brilliant time taking your questions @thismorning … #backtoschool SWIPE ➡️ to hear some of the tips I shared – AND to see which Hollywood star has gone home with a copy of ‘there’s still no such thing as naughty’ !! 🎊🎊💪🏼 #thismorning #theresnosuchthingasnaughty #parenting
Had a brilliant time taking your questions @thismorning … #backtoschool SWIPE ➡️ to hear some of the tips I shared – AND to see which Hollywood star has gone home with a copy of ‘there’s still no such thing as naughty’ !! 🎊🎊💪🏼 #thismorning #theresnosuchthingasnaughty #parenting
Had a brilliant time taking your questions @thismorning … #backtoschool SWIPE ➡️ to hear some of the tips I shared – AND to see which Hollywood star has gone home with a copy of ‘there’s still no such thing as naughty’ !! 🎊🎊💪🏼 #thismorning #theresnosuchthingasnaughty #parenting
Had a brilliant time taking your questions @thismorning … #backtoschool SWIPE ➡️ to hear some of the tips I shared – AND to see which Hollywood star has gone home with a copy of ‘there’s still no such thing as naughty’ !! 🎊🎊💪🏼 #thismorning #theresnosuchthingasnaughty #parenting
Had a brilliant time taking your questions @thismorning … #backtoschool SWIPE ➡️ to hear some of the tips I shared – AND to see which Hollywood star has gone home with a copy of ‘there’s still no such thing as naughty’ !! 🎊🎊💪🏼 #thismorning #theresnosuchthingasnaughty #parenting
My commentary in the @telegraph today On behalf of the children Thank you all for your kind support and words on here, they have meant a great deal, and I am so glad to know that it is bringing some comfort and release, for those of you who have experienced the same 🙏🏼 More to come on this issue as I hope we can raise awareness and effect positive change for all – and look at how we can embed trauma informed care at every level of our society – whether in the media and reporting cases, the legal system, schools, healthcare and beyond. I am always keen to hear from you about ways we may effect change and what this means for you a please do leave any thoughts in the comments or DM Then it’s back to parenting and responding to all your other messages asking for support and thoughts as we continue to navigate the summer holidays ! X #abuse #trauma #traumahealing #traumainformed @nspcc_official l @beaconhouseteam @mindcharity @the.greenhousebristol @one_in_four_uk
All animals draw on a number of defence mechanisms when stressed / afraid … one of them is to retreat, pull back, or even ‘flop / faint’ to ‘play dead When we are on overwhelm – our nervous system may encourage us to do the same If you are on overwhelm ( and with the school holidays who isn’t?) Listen to your body – what is it telling you, you need right now ? As a parent / carer we still have a responsibility to those dependent on us – but you can still take time for you, even with your children alongside. You might 👉Suggest everyone gets outside for a walk 👉Suggest a game – like building blocks or @lego anything that allows you to be physically present but for your mind to have the space to switch off a little 👉do some art together – finger painting / crayons / drawing / painting is very soothing for the part of our brain where anxiety originates 👉have an afternoon nap all together / get an early night ( I talk about the power of ‘readathons’ in my book ‘there’s STILL no such thing as naughty’ 👉watch a movie – the ‘to do’ list can wait another day And a good start is by taking two deep breaths in as you read these last few lines .. and let out one long breath – with a little moan if it feels right to do so .. you’re here, you’re ok, and ‘this too shall pass’ Life can feel complex and complicated, which is why we experience anxiety and ultimately overwhelm Taking small steps where we can, to allow ourselves a pause, and to acknowledge what we feel within, can offer us the space to come back to balance, ready to go again TAG anyone you think needs to see this – and save it for yourself – it’s not that we won’t feel overwhelmed at times – it’s how we work with it that counts 💪🏼♥️ Let me know what you’re going to do today – to allow yourself to pause .. #parenting #overwhelm #anxiety #summerholidays
For all those mamas and papas ( and grandparents and carers too!) worrying about next week’s nursery or reception start … I hear you and I see you & I see your children too. I wrote my first book ‘there’s no such thing as naughty’ when my children were still very young and I share my own experience of the juggle .. especially the mix of emotions when our children start their educational journey. With everything I have learned I say this – trust YOUR instincts and intuition and don’t be afraid to follow them too – I know it can seem like an ‘inconvenience’ if it’s our child in distress and ‘holding up the queue’ … but our children are not an inconvenience: if they are in distress they need our help. A child’s distress at being separated from their parent / carer is real. Why wouldn’t they feel some anxiety going into a room full of strangers when they have only ever known you as their safe space ? It takes time to build trust and ensure our children feel settled and safe It’s to everyone’s benefit that we are able to work WITH our children in these moments and take time to soothe, and if necessary to stay until they are happy to be left. This may take some time, but better this than prising a crying child from their parent before they are ready. There are many wonderful nursery and teaching staff whose warmth & compassion will help you. They know that children whose distress is not appropriately soothed, may be left with too high levels of cortisol and adrenaline that’s not healthy for body or brain – and even though some children appear ‘fine’ they may in reality be sitting with too high levels of stress that can endure for months Ensuring a healthy experience of separation now – can prevent anxiety around separations in the future As a mother who has been there – and as a qualified child therapist – I can show you how .. I’ll be taking calls tomorrow @thismorning leave any questions you have below and I’ll do a live tomorrow night on here too In the meantime, enjoy this precious time with your child – have a wonderful week with this delicious ☀️☀️and know that together we will get through !! #nursery #reception #backtoschool #parenting
For all those mamas and papas ( and grandparents and carers too!) worrying about next week’s nursery or reception start … I hear you and I see you & I see your children too. I wrote my first book ‘there’s no such thing as naughty’ when my children were still very young and I share my own experience of the juggle .. especially the mix of emotions when our children start their educational journey. With everything I have learned I say this – trust YOUR instincts and intuition and don’t be afraid to follow them too – I know it can seem like an ‘inconvenience’ if it’s our child in distress and ‘holding up the queue’ … but our children are not an inconvenience: if they are in distress they need our help. A child’s distress at being separated from their parent / carer is real. Why wouldn’t they feel some anxiety going into a room full of strangers when they have only ever known you as their safe space ? It takes time to build trust and ensure our children feel settled and safe It’s to everyone’s benefit that we are able to work WITH our children in these moments and take time to soothe, and if necessary to stay until they are happy to be left. This may take some time, but better this than prising a crying child from their parent before they are ready. There are many wonderful nursery and teaching staff whose warmth & compassion will help you. They know that children whose distress is not appropriately soothed, may be left with too high levels of cortisol and adrenaline that’s not healthy for body or brain – and even though some children appear ‘fine’ they may in reality be sitting with too high levels of stress that can endure for months Ensuring a healthy experience of separation now – can prevent anxiety around separations in the future As a mother who has been there – and as a qualified child therapist – I can show you how .. I’ll be taking calls tomorrow @thismorning leave any questions you have below and I’ll do a live tomorrow night on here too In the meantime, enjoy this precious time with your child – have a wonderful week with this delicious ☀️☀️and know that together we will get through !! #nursery #reception #backtoschool #parenting
For all those mamas and papas ( and grandparents and carers too!) worrying about next week’s nursery or reception start … I hear you and I see you & I see your children too. I wrote my first book ‘there’s no such thing as naughty’ when my children were still very young and I share my own experience of the juggle .. especially the mix of emotions when our children start their educational journey. With everything I have learned I say this – trust YOUR instincts and intuition and don’t be afraid to follow them too – I know it can seem like an ‘inconvenience’ if it’s our child in distress and ‘holding up the queue’ … but our children are not an inconvenience: if they are in distress they need our help. A child’s distress at being separated from their parent / carer is real. Why wouldn’t they feel some anxiety going into a room full of strangers when they have only ever known you as their safe space ? It takes time to build trust and ensure our children feel settled and safe It’s to everyone’s benefit that we are able to work WITH our children in these moments and take time to soothe, and if necessary to stay until they are happy to be left. This may take some time, but better this than prising a crying child from their parent before they are ready. There are many wonderful nursery and teaching staff whose warmth & compassion will help you. They know that children whose distress is not appropriately soothed, may be left with too high levels of cortisol and adrenaline that’s not healthy for body or brain – and even though some children appear ‘fine’ they may in reality be sitting with too high levels of stress that can endure for months Ensuring a healthy experience of separation now – can prevent anxiety around separations in the future As a mother who has been there – and as a qualified child therapist – I can show you how .. I’ll be taking calls tomorrow @thismorning leave any questions you have below and I’ll do a live tomorrow night on here too In the meantime, enjoy this precious time with your child – have a wonderful week with this delicious ☀️☀️and know that together we will get through !! #nursery #reception #backtoschool #parenting
For all those mamas and papas ( and grandparents and carers too!) worrying about next week’s nursery or reception start … I hear you and I see you & I see your children too. I wrote my first book ‘there’s no such thing as naughty’ when my children were still very young and I share my own experience of the juggle .. especially the mix of emotions when our children start their educational journey. With everything I have learned I say this – trust YOUR instincts and intuition and don’t be afraid to follow them too – I know it can seem like an ‘inconvenience’ if it’s our child in distress and ‘holding up the queue’ … but our children are not an inconvenience: if they are in distress they need our help. A child’s distress at being separated from their parent / carer is real. Why wouldn’t they feel some anxiety going into a room full of strangers when they have only ever known you as their safe space ? It takes time to build trust and ensure our children feel settled and safe It’s to everyone’s benefit that we are able to work WITH our children in these moments and take time to soothe, and if necessary to stay until they are happy to be left. This may take some time, but better this than prising a crying child from their parent before they are ready. There are many wonderful nursery and teaching staff whose warmth & compassion will help you. They know that children whose distress is not appropriately soothed, may be left with too high levels of cortisol and adrenaline that’s not healthy for body or brain – and even though some children appear ‘fine’ they may in reality be sitting with too high levels of stress that can endure for months Ensuring a healthy experience of separation now – can prevent anxiety around separations in the future As a mother who has been there – and as a qualified child therapist – I can show you how .. I’ll be taking calls tomorrow @thismorning leave any questions you have below and I’ll do a live tomorrow night on here too In the meantime, enjoy this precious time with your child – have a wonderful week with this delicious ☀️☀️and know that together we will get through !! #nursery #reception #backtoschool #parenting
Is your child starting nursery or pre-School soon? Remember very young children are navigating the world with a brain that is much less developed than your own It means that unfamiliar people and situations can put them into ‘fight/flight/flop’ This is the body’s NATURAL defence response to what might be perceived as a threat ie being left alone No matter that as adults we know our children will be safe, no matter that we know we have to work, no matter that we know we are coming back Many children at this age can’t ‘rationalise’ all of that just yet. They barely have a good grasp of time … so what is an hour to us can feel like forever to a very young child.. If your child expresses distress – SOOTHE If your child is clinging to you – it’s a sign they don’t FEEL SAFE … And that’s understandable – just as I imagine you would feel some anxiety in the example I share in the reel It’s our job – and the job of those people caring for our children – to ensure their environment feels safe .. and that they support us in soothing our children Installing a #bonding-bench is one way of doing that… a space in a corridor or in the playground where parents or carers can sit while a child who is struggling, can acclimatise to their new surroundings, coming back and forth to do what in therapy we call ‘reference’ the carer / mum / dad .. to allow them to build up the confidence ( and ultimately resilience ) to begin to enjoy their new fun surroundings & begin to ‘go it alone’ Many nurseries & schools are excellent at offering support to parents – with home visits, well-trained staff who understand attachment and distress and who help parents to soothe and ensure every child feels safe before / once they have crossed the threshold But trust your own instincts too – remember ‘if it feels wrong, it IS wrong’ and you are the strongest advocate for your child. Ensuring your child has a smooth and solid transition can make all the difference for future transitions Good luck and I will post plenty more here – with many more exercises and tips in my book ‘there’s no such thing as naughty’ #attachment #preschool #parenting #anxiety #parentingtips
My conversation with @katesilverton is brilliant. Kate has enormous insight and wisdom about her own experience of life and love. How many of us have acted out our own attachment trauma again and again? Here @katesilverton describes the patterns she kept repeating, the pain it cost her until she finally dared to trust and love Mike, her gorgeous husband. To hear further insights check out the link in Kate’s bio and to hear further insights find the link to the full episode in my stories or head to your favourite podcast platform. This episode is also available to watch on my YouTube Channel 🎧🎙️
Top tips for the return to school – this is a live I created on the hoof to share some of the tips and tools I share in my books ‘There’s no such thing as naughty’ ‘There’s still no such thing as naughty’ This live covers .. – how to create a visual ‘routine’ – connection bracelets – bonding benches – pebble in a pocket – soothing ourselves as much as our children ! Leave your questions below And join me on @thismorning on Thursday for more #parenting #resilience #backtoschool
The impact of being on our phones around our children. It’s having a bigger impact than we realise 🤳🏻. Haven’t stopped thinking about this since 🤯 This week we’re joined by broadcaster turned child therapist @katesilverton talking all about children’s behaviours & how we respond; from toddlers, tantrums, screen time, how to heal our inner child and so much more. Listen now! Link in bio & watch in full on our Patreon page. #Twonewmums #twonewmumspodcast #katesilverton #parentingpodcast #toddlers #screentime #toddlertantrums #theresnosuchthingasnaughty #mumlife #parentpodcast #parentinghelp #toddlerlife
“I left the BBC because…” Newsreader Kate Silverton reveals the reasons she left her role to become a child therapist 🧠 #virginradio #spooningpodcast
If we are to truly understand ourselves, we must look back … to see how far we have come This interview – out tomorrow – covers deeply personal aspects of my life – and I hope, in sharing these elements of my own journey, I may be helping others too. With my warmest and sincere thanks to @juliasamuelmbe for such a beautifully held interview. In grateful thanks to her and to all in this community who may now feel more able to extend compassion to ourselves even when we are struggling. repost … @juliasamuelmbe New Episode OUT TOMORROW ~ @katesilverton on the Hidden Struggles Behind Her Journey to Becoming a Therapist 🎙️🎧 In this episode of the Therapy Works podcast, I speak to Kate Silverton, a renowned broadcaster turned child therapist. We delve into a deeply personal and intimate conversation about navigating public and personal lives, overcoming complex childhood traumas, and the transformative power of therapy. Kate shares her journey from experiencing severe trauma in childhood to finding peace and healing through therapy. She discusses the challenges and triumphs of her career, her significant relationships, and her mission to break the cycle of trauma for future generations through her work with children and her books. We also explore the importance of self-soothing, emotional regulation, and the impact of healthy relationships. This episode will be available to download from tomorrow morning, either head to your favourite podcast platform, or head back here to find the direct link in my stories. I can’t wait to share this conversation with you all ♥️
Tomorrow’s @spooningwithmarkwogan sees me chat all things parenting and her fantastic new book with @katesilverton Available wherever you get your podcasts and on YouTube 🥄🥄🥄
The amazing @katesilverton shared the most enlightening advice on how, as parents, we can look after ourselves as well as our kids. Something we would all benefit from. Listen to our full chat wherever you get your podcasts. Or watch the full video at patreon.com/twonewmums • • • #katesilverton #theresnosuchthingasnaughty #innerchild #innerchildhealing #innerchildwork #parentssupportingparents #mumssupportingmums #timeforyou #selfhelp #selflove #healingjourney #mumlife #mumpodcast #twonewmums #parentpodcast
